It’s so entirely fitting that this month’s blog post comes to you late, as the topic today centres around the toll that following your dream can take. I have felt so incredibly overwhelmed lately, balancing my anxiety over Covid, parenting and preparing my book for publication has been just the tip of my worry iceberg lately. I have felt so overwhelmed, lost, and occasionally like, well, what’s the point?
Let’s be real, following your dream, working in the felid you are passionate about, and living your “best life” isn’t always easy. Sure, there are elements that will be surprisingly simple when compared to the painful teeth pulling of doing something you hate, but that doesn’t guarantee smooth sailing at all times. And, if we’re being really honest, you don’t want it to be- after all, it is failure that helps us learn, challenges that push us forward, and those struggles that make us really appreciate every little bit of our wins.
So, what do you do when the work you love is the cause of your stress?
Well, first, let’s look at that stress…
Anxiety, fear, stress… The first thing you need to do is work out a) what the feeling is, and b) what is causing it. Take a moment to dig around your brain and work out how you’re feeling and what is causing that particular emotional response. It could be something simple- maybe you don’t like the design for your cover and it’s stressing you out- or it could be a much larger issue- will this be a financially viable career path? Stressing about nothing is pointless and exhausting. Once you know WHAT is causing your turmoil, you can begin to address the issue.
Once you’ve got an idea of where your head is at, and where that stress is coming from, try some of these tips to make following your dream a little easier:
1. Address the issue as best possible: Sometimes you can’t do squat about what is stressing you out. Covid-19 is a perfect example. None of us has control over the large-scale issues surrounding CV atm- like lockdowns, social distancing, economic fallout. But we CAN do small things to take care of our physical and mental wellbeing during this pandemic- social distance, embrace a hobby, call loved ones that you can’t visit, take up yoga etc. The key is to focus on what you CAN do to reduce your stress levels.
2. Then let go of what you can’t change: Let it go. Release that energy to the universe. Find a higher power. Whatever you want to call it, carrying the extra weight around is exhausting, so put it down and walk away. You can only do your best with what you have. Don’t walk around hating on yourself because you finished 10 of your 11 tasks of the day. That mentality doesn’t make room for celebrating your wins and only brings down your entire mood.
3. Ask for help: Yep, you heard me. If “I love you” are those three words, then “ask for help” are THOSE three words. The ones that everyone dreads, but we all secretly know they are the key to a calmer mind and an easier life. “It takes a village to raise a child” and “teamwork makes light work” but somehow, we keep pretending we have to do it all alone. Stop it. Ask for help.
4. Accept good with the bad: It’s inevitable. Every job, even the best ones, have ugh jobs and meh days. It’s ok not to love your job EVERY day. Don’t let the Instagramers fool you- everyone has bad days. Nothing in life is perfect, and this won’t be either, but THAT. IS. OK.
5. Take breaks: Mentally and physically. Have a bath, make a cuppa, call a friend, watch some tv, go for a run, read a book… You NEED breaks to function properly. Ploughing through only makes you more exhausted.
6. Treat yourself for small wins: I love skittles. Kim Chance eats bags upon bags of Hersey's Kisses- I see you, Kim.
But you can reward yourself however you like. I’ve heard of students using chocolate bars for every chapter of a textbook during exam prep. You could merge your breaks, physical exercise, and rewards together by doing small sets of squats or push-ups between chapters. If you’re a neat freak, try a load of dishes to break up the monotony of emails, or chuck a load of washing on while you think about your next plot twist while outlining. The possibilities are endless.
7. Talk it out: Brainstorm and vent with friends and family. Even if they don’t have the solutions to your problem- like seriously, some people will never have any more than “sounds good to me” to your glaring plot hole-, it may help to get it out into the air, and help to clear your head of all the clutter.
8. Change your mindset: Following your dream doesn’t mean it will be a dream all the time so give yourself some grace. Remind yourself that every job comes with its challenges and this one will too. Try affirmations, or positive quotes around your workspace to remind you that working hard on something difficult is still an accomplishment. Sometimes it’s quitting that is the easy part but sticking it out will be much more rewarding.
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