Another month, another monthly challenge. And, I’m sad to say, another failure.
Well… kind of.
Let me explain…
This month’s challenge was to plan out my blog posts- start drafting what I could and begin creating social media posts for some- for the rest of the year- or at least the next six months.
To be fair, going into this challenge I had already planned out six months of MMCs and had a few ideas for other posts, ready to go. My aim was to take this initial list and flesh it out, making blogging for the rest of the year easier.
Needless to say, this did not happen- as I revise this post, before making it live, it’s Wed 10th April at 9:30pm, when it should have been posted today already.
If you’ve been watching my progress this year- across my blogs, social media etc- you’ll have noticed that I’ve struggled with the writing side of my goals in the first few months of 2019. I had big plans of all the things I was going to do (and tick off my list in fast-forward), and while I’ve chipped away at some a little bit, none of these tasks have got “DONE” next to them.
So, what is my lesson this month? You guessed it- REALISTIC GOAL SETTING.
Don’t get me wrong, when I planned out the first six months of MMCs and my additional writing goals alongside them, plus some other personal goals I would surely knock out of the park with no problems, it was totally reasonable for me to complete them. Based on my workload, physical health, and motivation levels at the time, I could see no reason why I would not achieve these goals.
BUT…
There was no wiggle room in these goals. There was no allowance for extra shifts coming my way, more social engagements than expected, or for a decline in health- no matter how big or small.
So, really, my lesson is about the difference between the TWO different versions of “realistic” goal setting. Didn’t know there were two? Consider these:
1. The “I’ve got this” version: When you look at your to-do list and your current circumstances and say, “I can squeeze this in if I push myself.”
2. The “Life Happens” version: When you think you can squeeze another task in, but allow yourself more time to work on it, in the event that something more important pops up and takes priority.
We’re all familiar with the “I’ve got this” version. You grab at everything you can, with a cute notebook and a dramatic hair toss, because, Girl! You GOT this!
It’s the “Life Happens” version I want to talk about.
We all seem to think that “life happens” is what we say when we don’t complete our tasks, or achieve our goals. But what if we incorporated it into our goal setting to begin with?
Sure, it sounds like a cop out. A way to procrastinate and spend more time on something that could be finished already. But what if you still pushed yourself to do better, complete goals sooner, while still allowing yourself some grace for interruptions?
How many of us have felt the guilt of not completing a task on time because life “got in the way” or we “took on too much” or just got sick and couldn’t handle it all? What if we removed the guilt by allowing for “Life Happens”- so when we do get sick we still have some time to complete those endless tasks- while still pushing ourselves to work hard and do all the things when we can- and giving the “Life Happens” a big ol’ “I got this!”
I like to consider my goals as fitting into two different categories. My “Hope” goals are what I want to achieve, what I aim for. And my “Realistic” goals are what I think I can actually do. Or if you like, “Need” and “Want” work too. When I look at my to-do list for the day, I HOPE to do everything on it, work hard to do all the things I WANT to do, but if I fall short, as long as I can get done what I NEED to do, I call it a win. Because, realistically, I can’t do it all. But I can do the important stuff, and then end the day with a win.
Looking at it this way helps in two major ways. 1. I don’t feel guilty if I don’t complete EVERYTHING. 2. I feel extra proud of myself on the days I complete more than I expect to.
So, consider your to-do list. Are there things on there that just aren’t that important? Could you reprioritize so that what NEEDS to be done is done first, and everything else can wait? Can you allow yourself more time to work on some tasks?
Don’t forget, this isn’t a way to slack off. If you do this right, you should find yourself impressed that you are getting more done than expected. It takes some practice, but I’ve discovered that making myself feel bad about not doing something I could have left off my list in the first place is redundant- it only makes me feel like a failure and now want to do the other things on my list.
In April I am utilizing Camp Nano to get some revisions done. I need to go through my poetry and prep it for publication. If you haven’t already, join me in challenging yourself this April.
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