Holy moly have I learned a lot throughout my writing journey this year! Like, really, if you ever find yourself unsure about if you know enough about something to pursue it, just take the leap and learn along the way- you’ll be surprised at how much you can learn on the job!
Anyway, a good chunk of what I learned this year I learned, either directly or indirectly, from Kaila Walker and her Bali retreat/monthly membership.
Here are my biggest lessons/takeaways…
Kaila herself:
Kaila is what I like to call a gentle-tough-lover. She’s got that ball busting, no excuses attitude, wrapped up in kind words and encouragement. She does an amazing job of creating a space for people to learn, grow, and connect with like-minded people.
The biggest takeaway from my time with Kaila is knowing how much writing really means to me. Kaila has pushed me to try new things, and step outside my comfort zone. And every time I have done so, I’ve done it thinking “it’s worth it”. Because if I’m being honest with myself, my writing is worth it. The time, money, energy, frustration, research etc. It’s worth all the good, bad and ugly stuff, to make my dream a reality. And I don’t know that I would have realised that if it weren’t for my experience with Kaila this year.
Bali Retreat and Bali Babes Facebook group:
I can never say enough about how much I learned from the Bali Writers Retreat in September. To read more about it, head to my post all about the experience.
But for a lot of us, “Bali” started long before we actually got to Bali. With the Bali Babes Facebook group set up so we could get to know each other before the retreat, we actually learned a lot before we ever stepped on a plane.
My biggest lesson here was all about taking risks. Whether that’s the financial risk in investing in a retreat or the small but insanely scary risk that is sending chapters out to be critiqued by others, all risks will pay off in one way or another.
As you’ll have picked up on by now, I am big on learning lessons in all areas in life- and risks are no different. For every choice in life, there are risks- both if you go ahead with something or not. And you can learn something from every single risk- whether it pays off or not. So, remember, when you’re assessing the risk associated with a choice, that it’s not all about win or fail- it’s about what you can learn in the process. If knowledge is power, then taking a risk, of any kind, is opening the door to a library of experiences and lessons to carry with you throughout your journey.
Monthly Membership Facebook group:
My first sense of the writing community was from watching YouTube videos. It was out there. I could be a part of it. But I didn’t actually feel a part of it, until this member group. This was the start of me connecting with other writers, pitching in my two cents and asking for help. Suddenly, I went from the outside looking in, to being a part of the community.
Community is important in all aspects of life and should never be undervalued. Even if you want to sit at home alone and do your own thing, having access to a community of people who get you and can help you when you struggle is so much more valuable that you can imagine.
I didn’t know this until I was a part of a community like this.
Live Write-Ins:
The live write-ins with Kaila were a first for me. I’d never written with other people before, never done sprints before, and never had set times for writing. So you can imagine that I learned a lot from this experience.
The main lessons I took from these though were largely about productivity. I learned that I really do write better at night, but that I can also get a lot done throughout the day- provided I don’t have too many distractions. I learned that sometimes I need background noise to get “in the zone”, but other times I need complete silence to focus. I also learned that my perfect sprint time is 30 minutes- I always thought an hour was better, but through a bit of trial and error I realised how wrong I was. And, as much as I love the accountability, motivation, and fun chats, I’ve come to realise that I get easily distracted when writing with others. I can do bits and pieces during a write-in, but if I want to focus on something big or difficult, I really need to write alone.
Monthly Challenges:
If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you’ll know that I have learned a lot about my approach to writing- and in some cases, life- through these challenges. If you’re new to my blog, make sure to check out my previous posts about each of the monthly challenges.
In a nutshell, I learned two major things from these challenges.
1. Challenge yourself. Whether big or small challenges, it’s important to push yourself from time to time. And, if you’re worried that the aim of the challenge is too unattainable, adjust your goal to suit your needs. Think you can’t manage 50k for Nanowrimo? Set yourself a lower word count goal that still pushes you, but is more attainable, and join the fun that way. The important thing is just that you push yourself and you learn from your wins as well as your losses.
2. Learn to embrace the mentality of progress and positivity compared to that of wins and losses. Sure, looking at something as a loss can motivate some to push harder next time. But if your one of those people (like me) who get disheartened and discouraged from a loss, try to re-frame the way you approach a challenge, and how you view your “win” or “loss”. Remember that any progress is better than no progress. And remind yourself that thinking negatively about your loss will impact your work more than the loss itself. If you get hard on yourself for writing 30k instead of 50k and end up walking away from your WIP, then you’ve just wasted that 30k on poor mentality. Instead, embrace and celebrate that 30k and go on to write more words, or even head on into revisions (if that 30k tied up the end of your MS)
Another lesson to note:
Self-care is a must! Don’t be generic with it though- do what’s right for you. If you don’t like baths, don’t fill one with bubbles and pour a glass of wine, just because someone on Instagram did. On the flip side, if that’s your jam, throw in some candles and watch your worries drift away.
And if you struggle with making time for self care, or you don’t know what will relax you, start small and slowly increase its presence into your life. Read before bed occasionally. Take 30mins once a week to sit with a cup of tea and do nothing. Leave your phone in a room and walk away for an hour. Slowly find new ways to relax and unwind, and incorporate those things into your weeks, and days, more often
Just a reminder: You can learn something from every situation in life. You don't have to sign up to a membership to learn new things about yourself, your craft, or your life. But if you do, make sure to keep your eyes peeled for new tips, ideas and inspiration.
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Kaila provided me with a platform to learn a lot, and I am incredibly grateful for that. She gave me a push to find my feet, and now, more than ever, I am so excited to follow my dream- and take you all along for the ride.
2018 has been a whirlwind of a year for me and I am in love with where I've ended up. I can honestly say that I am so happy with how my year has ended up, and I am really excited to get cracking on 2019. I have lots of new things coming up, and I can't wait to share it all with you.
I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe holiday season, and I will be back in the new year with lots of love, updates and tips for you.
oxox
- Jacinta
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